Little moments that make me appreciate this journey
Shitty queue
We built a queuing system to track patients. We get the first 2 letters of their first name, and the last 2 letters of their last name and assign this as their queue ticket name. These queue ticket names are displayed on a TV.
Day 1 of deployment, a patient named SHaleena MagahIT (modified name) walks in.
On-board or off-board?
During a client onboarding, our client’s employee did a screen share. We saw a tab titled RESIGNATION LETTER. Do we proceed or wait for him to resign?
Salary day
By contract, we had to white-label our services and pretend we’re from head office. During a Q&A, an employee asked, “So when will our salary arrive?”
Salary day-layed
When negotiating payment terms with a client, the client’s employee responded with, “15–30 days? I don’t know. Even my salary is delayed.”
Technically correct
A senior developer asked a junior developer to remove all test errors. The junior developer deleted all test code.
Ultra-awkward ultrasound
Our teammate was inspecting an ultrasound machine. His arm bumped into a probe. It was wet. A woman walks out of the dressing room. They make eye contact. Radio-tech then cleans said probe.
Protected!
An HIV laboratory client gave us a few hundred condoms. Not funny, but nice.
Patience is a virtue
We were reading the source code of a competitor (they left it accessible). Their plural of patient is… patience.
Slacking on the job
We checked Slack message stats. The most active private chat was between a guy and a girl. They panicked when we told them.
They got married in 2024. Congratulations Josh and Leslie! ❤
Work hazard
At the height of the pandemic, we were inspecting paper forms for us to digitize. One person picked up a paper form. Another person shouted “THATS INFECTED!”
Mock data
I was demoing our software to a few hundred medical technologists—nationwide. Due to data privacy, we had to use mock data. In that demo, I said, out loud: “So we assign this RT PCR batch to Dr. Johnny Sins.”
I later found out that Johnny Sins is also an astronaut.
Comeback
Whenever someone opens their screen, it’s customary to insinuate something inappropriate is open. One teammate opened his laptop and I shouted “I didn’t know you were on Grindr.”
His response? “That’s the only place where you reply quickly.”
Thank you, sugar daddy
We were buying a laptop for a teammate. A guy and I walked in an Apple Store. He did all the paperwork while I idly stood nearby. When everything was settled, I grabbed the bag shouted: “Thank you, sugar daddy!” and ran out the store.
The Apple Store staff had a look of jealousy.
Veronica is cute, ngl
In a camera-on cross-company meeting, in intern FB pm-ed another intern: “Veronica is cute, ngl.” The recipient left his screen-share on. Flustered, said intern takes over the call,“Henry, you left your screen share on. I repeat, Henry, you left your screen share on.”
Veronica was in that call.
Nigerian prince
Back when we were a volunteer group, a Nigerian guy joined our team. Our South African teammate, excited by another brother, did a quick stalk.
Read: Police arrest former banker for allegedly swindling over 200 Nigerians in illegal forex deals
This is why we have a tougher screening process for Dashlabs.ai
BDSM
We pride ourselves in stupid team names. One team is named Billing, Disbursements, and Shop Management. It handles… well those things. The team’s manager turned out to be more innocent than we thought.
In an external meeting, she proudly announces: “Hi, I’m Germaine of BDSM!”
